when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
