So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
