i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
