Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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