tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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