It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
