That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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