The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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