Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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