Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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