This is not my ceiling
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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