So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
is that a dick in a sweater?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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