i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
