You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
