Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
