Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
