So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
