tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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