I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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