I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize