She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
