mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
