The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
