the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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