I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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