i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
look no pants
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
