she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
