Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
