What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
