Its about making memories worth repressing
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
