I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
