drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
