I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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