sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
