Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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