Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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