she woke up with a sticky ear
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
