he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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