they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize
