Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
