if you like me you must not know who I am
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Randomize
