Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
