I'm sorry my penis didn't work
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize