Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
