awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
We had to coat check the pizza.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
