she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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