My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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