Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
