I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
