no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
